knot eve in mice hell elf

monday was young dems meeting, chatted about locations and planning and recruitment and coffee and giggles. tuesday is today it's really only tuesday? because that just doesn't feel right. this job is draining me of myself and i can't pretend for much longer. and telling myself that and not doing anything to change it is idiotic.

i am trying to stay busy because i feel good being busy but i need to find some time to throw at this resume thing. tomorrow is gym 545-645 and then maybe band practice somewhere? which means thursday is young dems full meeting around 6 so i could find 30m here and there and ultimately come up with something to review on friday.

*

i want to sink into you
but i don't know how to
release myself around anyone
not even myself
no, not even myself.
and sometimes i fall over
and i try to recover
but covering things up
doesn't stop the decay
for i fall and i get up and broken i fall
and i break and i keep on, i exacerbate
self-inflicted destruction of self
it's coming faster now
and i'll be shattered
then who will i be?
infinite mirrors in a funhouse
drift from novel to old-hat
and funhouse to prison
and it's not all fun
no it's not all fun
at all.
i surround myself with things i value
but i need to value breathing things
that don't sigh in dust
that don't run on batteries.
once upon a time i skipped in the sun
and now the rain won't stop
and that shouldn't determine my mood
but it's poetic that it should
so it will today
it will today